Open Your Eyes
by beloved.valentine
Summary: My first Aurikku fic! I hope it goes over well... Reviews? Chapter Four is finally up! Read and Review please!
1. Chapter 1

_My home is in motion,  
As darkness unfolds,  
The airoverloaded,  
The sky stands in gold,  
But you went away,  
You left me to stay,  
We'll see us in heaven,  
I'm counting the days._

The End- Groove Coverage

* * *

**Chapter One**

He hated me, and I knew it.  
He knew I knew it, or at least... I think.  
I mean.. c'mon!  
Thinking he's mister some "super-awesome guardian", gimme a break...  
Seriously, he thinks of no one obviously but himself.  
How can he sit there and lead someone to their death for a second time.  
He doesn't care if Yuna's gunna or not!  
..What an ass...

--

Sitting there, everyone, all seven of us, huddled around the single magically lit fire in the center, gratitude to Lulu's black magic and a couple logs. It was the night before we reached Zanarkand, the night before Yuna would meet her demise.. Or so she thought anyway, Tidus and I thought otherwise.

I remember that night clearly, for, aside from the sulking faces and the depression that lingered over us, it was the best night of my life.. The one I cherished most.

Yuna sat before the fire, like everyone else, her eyes staring into the raging flame before us; licking the logs we scrounged up from around the area, leaving a charcoal streak behind. Of course, like everyone expected, to her left sat Tidus. It was funny; really, everyone saw how deeply they had fallen for each other, aside from themselves, of course. Wasn't that the way love always worked? Beside me, however, sat the blue-furred Ronso, his strong arms folding over lighter-coloured matted fur his chest, the only source of armor he had aside for his harpoon... if you could call that armor I guess. I sat slouched over, my elbows rested on the corresponding knee, hands dangling lazily between my legs. I had stolen a few looks from the gruff brute across the way, hoping that he wouldn't notice, but secretly hoping that he did. I had taken a liking to him recently, and it baffled me. Only a few days earlier had I wanted to strangle him for being so stuck up, so mean, so… _broody._ It infuriated me that he could hide his emotions so easily, to seem like he did not give the slightest care of the world around him. I envied him for that, I'd give him that much…

I remembered back to when we were crossing the Thunder Planes, how he deliberately didn't want to stop for me. How he seemed to suddenly brainwash everyone with his logic, geez.. Give me a break. It's not my fault I had a bad experience with water and thunder. If it happened to him, I guarantee he would have acted the same way too! I doubt that stuck-up jerk would like being fried by a thunder spell...

Though, none-the-less, I continued to stare at _him_, the red-clad man sitting directly across from me, on the other side of the fire. The sun was beginning to set, painting the earth and what was left of what we figured was Tidus's Zanarkand, the tiny pyreflies hovered above the water, giving it an eerie look, yet somehow beautiful.

It was only when the sun had faded, sunken behind the horizon when the ebony curtain took over that I had become strangely tired. I figured it was because of the depression everyone felt that night, causing their lids to fall over their eyes in fatigue, for, Lulu was already fast asleep, her head against Wakka's shoulder. A small grin crossed my complexion, they were perfect for each other, and they knew it, just like Yuna and Tidus, absolutely perfect. I stifled a yawn, sinking down onto the ground so the small of my back was up against the log. It was the best I could do, really, there was nothing else to sleep on. Everyone else was slowly falling asleep, so why shouldn't I? I knew Yuna was coming close to resting, I saw her leaning awkwardly forward a few times, her golden-haired knight told her to rest, but of course, she refused. I slowly fell asleep from their gentle chatter, huddled up against the cold log…

But I had awakened. Why? I was cold. Sitting up, my back was quite sore from the position I was in; obviously, it had been an awkward one. The fire in the center of us was dwindling, only a tiny flame remained. Maybe that was the cause of the cold feeling that ran down my spine, I had no one to hold onto for warmth, where as the other two couples did and, well, Kimhari was covered in fur. It wasn't my fault Sanuba Desert was hot as hell and I had to dress so.. _Scantily_, some would say. I just never had time to go out and buy anything else.. You know, with the journey and all. Other then that, I never really thought about it.

Usually I would have just curled right back up into a ball and try and catch some more shuteye, but there was something, no, someone missing, however. My swirled hues, looking over the five other people around the fire... Where was Auron? Averting my eyes to the hill that had risen with some debris scattered amongst it, there he stood. The bottom of his crimson jacket billowed slightly behind him from a light gust of wind.

Standing, I stretched my arms to either side of my body before walking towards him silently. I don't know if he had some kind of sixth sense or something, or if he could hear extremely well. Either way, he knew I was there.

"Why are you up?" He questioned me. Auron had not turned around to look at me, his eyes remained on the water in front of him as the small pyre flies danced across it. Parting my lips to speak, an awkward sound came from my throat.

"I.. –I was cold." I replied, nodding in success. It's not like I was lying or anything, I was telling him the truth. I just found it so difficult to talk to him as of late.

"I see.. Try to get some rest…" He told me, but who did he think I was? I wasn't going to back to sleep… I just woke up.

Rubbing my eyes a bit, I blinked and joined him at his side, ignoring his last statement. He glanced at me out of his single, russet-coloured eye over the rim of his ebony-tinted glasses. Why did he wear those anyway? No one knew. I thought he was trying to draw attention away from his closed, scarred eye, but I wasn't entirely sure. Either way, it didn't really do anything at all.

"Tomorrow, huh?" I mumbled, folding my arms across my chest and rubbing either forearm for warmth. I allowed a chilled breath to pass from my lips, and once again he looked over to me. Only then did I wonder if he realized I had been staring at him earlier over the fire.

He said nothing in reply.

I allowed a small, irritated huff escape from within my throat from no responses on his behalf. That was annoying. It was like talking to a wall, a breathing wall. Actually, I don't even think I heard him breathing.

"It came so fast.." I mumbled, glancing at him out of the corner of my eye to see if he had actually heard anything that I said. Though he didn't budge. It seemed like the second I glanced at him, he shifted his eyes to the calm waters below.

Definitely a wall. He didn't really have any shape to him at all.. Well, not that I could see under that crimson garb of his. Well.. His arms did, I knew that much for sure. Like when we were in battle and he sliped his arm out from beneath his clothing to fight properly. His bicep was firm when I had looked, shaped beautifully, he must be incredibly strong and.. Oh no… when were these thoughts popping into my head? And since when did I think of Auron that way?

"She's going to die tomorrow…" I blurted out of nowhere, my voice suddenly becoming grave and depressed. I had fallen asleep to escape those thoughts from entering into my head, but that was just a simple hour or so of false security. I didn't hear him move, I didn't even want to look at him, but I heard a gentle rumble of what I figured was his voice. My mind was already too concentrated on trying to think of a way for Tidus and I to save Yunie. I didn't want her to die, and personally, I didn't care for what he had to say at the moment. That's only when I realized that my eyes began to water. I tried to bat the salty signs of weakness from my eyelids.

I heard him speak again, followed by a frustrated sounding sigh. Only after the fact did I wish I knew what he said to me. Every word he ever said I wish I had memorized..

I gently shook my head, I'm guessing by his sudden gestures and facial expression it corresponded with what he was saying. I slid my hands up my arms so they were now resting on my shoulders, my forearms crossing my chest. My tears seemed to be ignoring my command, begging them to stop from falling. I tilted my head forward, as if to take away from my face, trying to hide my own expressions behind a emotionless mask. It confused me a little why I acted in such a way.. I never usually cried, actually. Yunie was a different matter, but still, didn't I usually hide it behind a dashing smile?

I hadn't noticed it had all fallen silent until the gentle sound of my tear had fallen against the dry earth between my feet. He could continue talking for all I care; he never usually talked much, so why would he speak now? I didn't care about anything right now besides for what he would think if he saw me crying. Would he think I was weak? Most likely, he always thought I was weak. Physically, and emotionally. I was simply a waist of oxygen. Maybe it was because of individuals like me did people look down upon the Al Bhed as such scoundrels, like some sort of inferior race. But if he had heard me sneaking up behind him with silent footsteps, I was so sure that he would hear even the slightest sound like that. It was only when I realized that I spun around, taking in a breath greedily for oxygen. I had been holding my breath so no sudden sobs would catch his attention. Maybe he hadn't heard what I thought he had, maybe I was over thinking.

"Maybe I should go back to sleep…" I muttered after the large sob, which I hoped to bottle within me escaped. I was no use up here anyway; I was only annoying him greatly. I pulled my hands up to my face, shielding my eyes from his piercing stare. I didn't want to think about what he was thinking right now, I didn't want to know.

It was only then when I began my decline, when I had been moving away did I hear a few hurried footsteps from behind me. I never really paid any attention to them until I felt his strong, solid arm slip around my waist followed by his other one. I'm guessing he slipped it from within his garb before he grabbed me, because I never noticed it out of its sling before. I took in a sharp breath as tears continued to stream down my face, I heard his heavy, shallow breathing I would have never noticed before in my ear, his hot breath traveling down the side of my cheek and against my neck. To tell you the truth, I didn't really know what to think at that moment, I was completely and utterly confused.

Moments later, I turned around in his arms, burying my face into his chest. My fingers slipped from the side of my face and gripped his crimson clothing. I shook a bit, or so I think. It might have been quite a bit, but my heart was beating profusely. His scent was invigorating, seeming to begin to relax me. It reminded me of ancient texts and incense, a mysterious scent with a bit of the damp smell of the Macalania Woods. Maybe before when he was speaking to me, he was trying to convince me that there was a way to actually save Yunie, but I don't know… I wish I did.

I didn't say anything to him; I just stood there with him, continuing to sob against his chest. I never really realized how firm and shaped his chest and abdomen was until I was pressed against him.. Not that I noticed it then, but I can remember it now. I was too busy crying before, and it was all so sudden. Maybe from him suddenly taking me into his arms.. Maybe that's really what made me begin to cry.

As I began to calm down, I felt his chest begin to rumble as he spoke. It reminded me of the rolling thunder across the dark sky in the Thunder Planes, but this time, it did not scare me, his voice only pulled me closer into his warm, inviting embrace.

"Rikku…" He called my name. It seemed like that was only the third time that night I had listened to him. I lifted my head slowly, much like the time when I had originally met him, when he asked me to raise my head to look at my emerald eyes. He was correct about me, I was an Al Bhed, and it surprised me… Wakka did not realize until we were attacked later on.

I raised my head, but not my eyes however. I was afraid to look at him. I was afraid to see the expression on his face… Then he called my name again.

"Rikku.." He said softly. I could tell he wasn't angry. I realized that I had been analyzing the tone of his voice recently. When he was angry, his voice dripped with that venomous growl. When he was cocky, he usually didn't talk much, adding an odd, soft chuckle in.. You never really saw that part of him though. But now, It was a different voice, a supportive one.. it was weird, but I liked it.

Once again, I didn't raise my head to meet his single chestnut eye with both of mine. He waited patiently for me to do so, though I never did. There was another thing he preformed that startled me, never once had I seen or ever thought he would do such a thing. I could feel his bare arm slip from the exposed skin of my lower back. He moved slowly… Fluidly. I felt his unusually cool fingertips press against my cheek, followed by his palm flattening out against the even surface. His hand traced down to my chin, lifting it so I was looking up at him. I took a quick glance at his face, my eyes slightly reddened from crying, and because of that, I looked away immediately. His eyes seemed pained and full of sorrowful. An expression I never read on his face before.

A heard a gentle sigh from his mouth as he spoke my name one more time, though in a greatly softer tone. "Rikku.. Look at me…"

I looked up at him like he had asked. Tears began to well up beneath my lids again. Why was I suddenly so weak? I never felt like this before, it was a foreign feeling, as I figured it would be for him. I felt like my knees were going to suddenly give out from beneath me.

As the tears began to surface again, I felt his hand swiftly slip beneath my chin, angling my head up towards him. I felt his lips lock with mine. He captured my bottom lip, nipping it once, perhaps by accident, either way, it was a movement I would not have expected and it stunned me. I did nothing other then close my eyes in response, my tears seemed to have halted there. Not once in that day… no, through the entire journey did I see myself ever becoming anything with Auron, not once did I think of anything like this ever happening. One of my hands, which were still clinging to his loose crimson clothing, shifted to his tear-stained ebony shirt beneath the garb. I felt him tug at my lower lip before releasing it followed by him leaning in again and taking it within his grasp. His foreign movements only caused my heart to race. I wanted this moment to last forever, but every good thing came to an end… it was always like that. But not now, please not now…

I felt him tug away as shuffling was heard below. Damn you Tidus, and to hell with you too, Wakka. The first time I had seen any other kind of affection, and to me of all people and it had to end to suddenly. I felt his arms tighten around me before he released me. They were waking up. Him and I both knew this moment had to come to an end…

But that was so long ago.. Though I remember it like yesterday…


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

I sat inside of Brother's ship, my usual spot up in front with Buddy and Brother. I heard Shinra typing away at his station. I think my brother could detect… My unhappiness you could say as of late, I just wasn't my perky self. Though he didn't pry, I thanked the gods for that.

I had been thinking of him again. That one moment between the two of us, it frightened me to think I was alone now.. Without him. Sure, Yunie and Brother were here, but that wasn't the same. I _needed _him. It was sad.. To think that all of us but the two people Yuna and I cherished most had disappeared to the Farplane. Yuna just… _sent_ him, just as easily as Tidus had disappeared. I have never really dealt with anything like with anything like this before, besides for the destruction of Home. But this… it just seemed to have a greater impact. It wasn't the same.

"Rikku!" The heavy accented Al-Bhed voice of Brother was heard from my left. The rolling R at the beginning of my name is all that really caught my attention. Lifting my head abruptly, my swirled, emerald eyes looked up to my brother, staring down at me urgently.

Basically, I had lost focus..

Again.

I felt the Celcius begin to descend, passing through the white, fluffy clouds with ease. Just that, the view of Spira from this angle, hanging in the air.. it was remarkable. Just the scenery usually took my breath away, but even the simplest things like that did not excite me lately.. not the last few years.

"Sorry!" I squeaked, allowing my fingers to fly across the control panel in front of me. "Umm.. I think I'm picking up sphere waves!" I said in the best mock-happiness expression I could. It was so hard though… Especially after thinking about him again..

I heard Buddy confirm the sphere I had just picked up. Perfect timing. Seriously, it couldn't be any better. "…--In the Zanarkand Ruins!" I chimed, though I definitely didn't want to go there… that was one of the last places I wanted to go. That was where everything seemed to have unfolded, now that I look back at it.. There's where my understanding began.

"Got it!" The accent of my brother hollered, I could hear Yunie race towards me, peering into the tiny screen I was tapping desperately and Paine was soon to follow. "What do you think it is?" Yuna asked me, I heard a simple groan from the swordswoman beside her. "I dunno! Hope it' something good!" I blurted, thrusting a fist into the air. I surprised myself… how could I act so happy when I really wasn't? It made me angry… Maybe Auron's attitude had really taken a toll on me; really hit me hard.

"Another treasure sphere?" Paine mumbled, both of her arms folded overtop of her chest. "I hope so!" I replied quickly, jumping out of my pod to stand with Yuna and Paine of our little group. "Ready?" I asked, surveying both of their faces. My own voice began to sicken me.. I wondered how Auron could really put up with me.. Simply listening to my high voice was aggravating… Everything was relating back to him.

"Yeah!" Yuna nodded, lowering both of her hands to grab both of her pistols, holding them out at arms length in front of her, either forearm crossed over one another. Paine simply nodded, lifting her right hand and brushing it through her loose bangs that hung in her face. And I, well… I was ready as I would ever be. I didn't even have anything to remind me of him anymore, only my memories. I can't believe I lost it… No, I couldn't have! I would never loose something of such importance to me. I would definitely not loose the rosary he gave me, the same one he hung off the side of the wide belt he wore around his waist. He had given that to me as we exited the ruins.. His movements were so subtle. That was the second time we were alone, however, everyone was awake and moving. We were just.. Lagging behind a little.

I remembered him pressing the cold beads into my hand, gently closing my fingers around the sacrilegious item. I simply held it in my hand without really looking at it; I knew he didn't want me to, not yet. I knew he wanted me to wait until I was alone somewhere, however, I already knew what it was. I felt myself wanting to glance at it every so often along the way. When we reached an inn though, I raced to my room as best as I could, putting on the sleepy act with the odd dramatic yawn. They all let me go to bed early that night, though if I ever saw Yuna or Tidus put on such a horrible display as I did that evening, I would definitely suspect something.. The minute I closed the door to the room I had purchased, I pried open my hand to look at the gift I had received. It was old, I could tell you that much, which told me that it was used often. The once brightly coloured beads were faded. By simply looking at it, I could tell it was originally put to good use, when he was younger possibly. I could never see him kneeling down and praying now, no, not the Auron I knew.

That was the same rosary he was given when he was a monk at the temple in Bevelle… When he still guarded Yunie's dad, Lord Summoner Braska. It used to make me giggle thinking about him working in a temple, one of the very ones that we visited on Yunie's journey. But he was exiled for one reason or another and well.. I guess he still kept it with him for superstition reasons.. but what could you be possibly afraid of if you're already.. well.. dead?

I felt the airship jerk awkwardly as Brother touched down on the outskirts of Zanarkand. He apologized as it pulled my from my thoughts for the rough landing and I simply pouted. I shouted to him that I could have landed the bird a lot smoother then that. I heard Yunie giggle before taking off for the hatch. It was our time now. Time to hunt down that sphere.


	3. Chapter 3

_Hehe, I'd like to thank you guys for the reviews. It makes me happy to see them in my inbox, knowing someone is actually reading this. It's an awesome feeling! It keeps me motivated to continue writing. Thanks guys!_

* * *

_I'm going home,  
Back to the place where I belong,  
And where your love has always been enough for me.  
I'm not running from.  
No, I think you got me all wrong.  
I don't regret this life I chose for me.  
But these places and these faces are getting old  
So I'm going home._

_Home- Chris Daughtry_

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**Chapter Three**

I had figured she thought little of me,  
wanted nothing to do with me.. per say.

She must have looked at me as some old fool..

Yes, you could say I was, for I was madly in love with her.

I nearly regret showing my emotions, however..

It was unfair to her...

--

I released her, shoved her aside to live up to my own "legendary" expectations… Heh, what a name.. Legendary what? Guardian? I couldn't even show my affection towards her properly.. And what good was a guardian leading their own summoner they were supposed to protect towards their own death? I knew exactly what was going to happen to Yuna.. The same that happened to her father… But she was my only escape route back to the Farplane without spilling any unnecessary information. Information… my life story; what I was. I could not bear to tell her what I was; I didn't want to break her heart any more. By simply pushing her aside I could see the pain in her eyes. That was an irresponsible move on my behalf, I should never had shown any emotion towards her, I would only continue to crash and burn in the end, possibly taking her down with me. I just hope she would forget about me for her own good…

"Try to get some rest.." I muttered to her, my feeble attempt to try and push her away, trying to break it that I had no real feelings for her.. However, by now I figured her and I both knew that was a lie. She merely stared towards the dwindling campfire, her dry eyes seeming gloss again. I had eased her pain for a moment.. But she did as I had suggested lowly and ran down to the small group below before anyone had really noticed she had disappeared.

Wakka was the first to wake, which merely seemed like a miracle.. On any other day at least. Today, it was of some inconvenience. However, he seemed to be completely oblivious of his surroundings. He only completely woke up when Rikku got settled back into her spot on the ground in which from moved from earlier, but it was Lulu leaned against his shoulder sleeping which made him more alert. I noticed a faint, pink flush cross his cheeks, even from where I was standing. Seeing that the alchemist was smiling subtly, I figured she was either happy about the moment with us that had just taken place, or she thought his reaction was rather humorous.. However, it was none of my concern and I completely denied she was happy about the incident just moments ago… no matter how much I was internally warring against myself with this debate. I continued to lie to myself as I shook my head and turned my back to them. It would be a while until everyone woke up… that would give me a little time at least…

Surprisingly, it was Yuna whom woke up last. Though it was expected. That was her night to reminisce, to remember her past and to decide her future. Though I would still think Tidus would have woken up the latest. I heard the odd conversation rise before she had wakened up. It was only until I heard the Blitzball player laugh at Wakka's good morning to the summoner. "Rise and shine sleepyhead!" He bellowed, luring over the woman. "Yuna tired. Yuna stay up late." The massive Ronso added in, even he was adding into that conversation. "You should fix your hair this time!" Her blonde lover replied, either hand on his hips, referring to the previous time she had slept in. That comment merely made me grin.

I heard various laughs as Yuna sat up. I supposed she was smiling by the tone of her voice. "What time is it?" She mumbled. I could almost play the scene out without even glancing over at them looming over her. "About ten o'clock.." The black mage replied. It was only then had I turned around to watch the scene unfold. Yuna had screamed, shoving one of the wool blankets we carried along off of her body, jumping up and running her fingers through her hair. Everyone laughed again, including Rikku. However, I could tell it was not the usual full-hearted grin plastered across her face. Something was bothering her.

I heard if an individual stares at one for one enough, the other could feel their eyes upon them. Rikku turned to glance at me before shifting her eyes away with a shy smile. It may have just been me, but she was acting.. Well, different now.

As if that simple stare had cured her completely, the thief jumped up from the ground, thrusting her fist in the air. "We leave once Lady Yuna fixes her hair!" She imitated in an exaggerated, deep voice I figured was supposed to be mine. Obviously that story was told to her more than a few times, but everyone seemed to have laughed at her faux tone before turning to me slowly.

It wasn't even twenty minutes before we left the site. Tidus and Wakka took the front, followed by Lulu and Kimarhi on either side of their summoner. Rikku fell just behind Yuna and I brought up the rear. It was a different routine for me today, however, I did not mind so much. The two Blitzball players seemed to be full of energy, it would be best for them to defend the front, I suppose.

I had been thinking as of late, as of last night. What if what happened was for a reason? I acted on my own ambitions for a reason, out of pure instinct to protect her. However, my thoughts were cut short by a particular pair of swirled, emerald eyes staring up at me from my side. I glanced to the alchemist with my single eye with a brow raised in question. Why was she staring at me like that? A smug grin was plastered across her face, both of her hands hidden behind her back. She was up to something and I knew it.

Simply brushing her off and lowering my gaze to the footsteps of the comrades in front of me, I heard her own feet take a few running steps. She ended up on the other side, doubling over and angling her head so her eyes would lock with my only one. I looked at her with yet another confused expression before allowing an exasperated grunt to be created from within my throat. It was only until she ran in front of me; walking backwards did I raise my head. We both heard Tidus in the distance laughing a bit from one reason or another, but when Wakka hollered back to her, did I realize that Tidus was laughing at how Rikku seemed to be bothering me.

"Aww, Rikku! Leave Sir Auron alone, yah? Stop botherin' him!" The retired captain of the Besaid Aurochs bellowed, his loud voice echoing off of the eroding wall to our right and into the widespread of the ruins to our left.Rikku spun around, both of her hands on her hips with that forced put across her lips.

"I'm not bothering him! Look, he's his normal broody self! Watch" Rikku spun around and poked my bicep a couple times. My brows furrowed as if through instinct before I heard Wakka shout again.

"Exactly! You're bothering him!" He hollered back at the Al-Bhed with some sort of hatred in his voice. He was only just getting over his internal problem with her race.

"Nah! He's just faking it! Turn around and protect Yuna already!" She replied rather proudly, waking her hand through the air before brushing him aside. I saw him part his lips in protest, but Lulu mumbled something I did not catch which caused him to turn around. Once again, I felt Rikku's eyes upon me.

"I wasn't bothering you, was I?" She asked me, tilting her head before bouncing back over to my right side.

"…Watch for fiends.." I merely replied.

"Aww… pissan…" I heard her mumble in native tongue.

"Mmm.. pynamo" I responded with the little bit of Al-Bhed knowledge I knew. I saw her simply blink before crossing her arms over her chest in disapproval of my response.

I gave her a while to pout quietly at my side. I noticed her glance up at me a couple times, as if to grab my attention. The one time I glanced down at her, she turned away with a small "hmph" imitation I was guessing. Another reenactment of me I suppose. However, I noticed her grinning and glancing back to see if I caught anything.

There had to have been at least ten minutes of silence from her, which seemed nearly impossible. But I waited to see if she would attempt to aggravate me again. No dice. I glanced up to the crowd in front of us for any signs of them staring back at us for some reason or another. All of their backs were facing us, perfect.

Sliding my hand beneath my arm resting within the make shift sling provided by the low V-neck of my garb, I pulled out the one thing that had much meaning to me at all, one of the only things that related me to the teachings of Yevon. A rosary. Clutching the glass, dark beads within my gloved hand tightly, I gently nudged the woman next to me to allow her arms to fall from their crossed position over her chest. I moved my hand to meet with hers, subtly slipping the beads into her grasp. I saw a slight, pink, flush cross over her cheeks. By that, I assumed she thought I was moving my hand to hold hers, however, I believe she realized I would never do that, not in public at least.

A confused look appeared on her face as she looked up at me. I simply pressed forward. A part of me wanted to see the expression on her face from the gift I had given her, but I greater part of me pushed me to continue onward, without looking back.. And that was exactly what I did. I heard the alchemist's feet stop. I suppose she was admiring it. Though I heard her footsteps pick up and run in front of me, a deep crimson shade across her face. However, she fell just behind Yuna's step. I saw her glace back at me a couple times, which caused me to smile secretly behind the tall collar of the garment I wore. Tidus's voice broke the silence even though it was a low mumble.

"I guess she finally got on his nerves.." He mumbled to Wakka with a snicker.

"I--I heard that!" She shouted back in a vicious tone. At least they didn't suspect anything.. Perfect.

I suppose.. My feelings for her were an internal feeling rather than a sudden one last night… Though it may have happened for a reason, it still shouldn't have happened and that gift, well… It didn't help. I was bringing upon my own downfall, at the cost of her own.


	4. Chapter 4

_Ahhh! This one not only took much longer then I expected, but it is also much shorter then I intended it to be!  
I hope you guys havn't given up hope on me yet!  
Read and Review please! 3_

_Oh! And just incase I have a couple of my few readers who are slightly lost in what's happening, I'm just basically bouncing backand forth between the two characters to get their P.o.V's on the situation from past to present. Hope it's not too confusing._

_Cheers  
-b.v 3_

* * *

**Chapter Four**

A mistake.

Childish behavior on my behalf, I shouldn't have left any trace of my being what so ever. At least I had taken that rosary away from her ages ago… I was trying to omit myself from her memory, but obviously my attempt was futile. But, truth be said, I didn't want her to forget—I wanted her to remember even the finest details as I did… But I was simply being foolish.

I stood silently in the Farplane, upon the wide, vast field surrounded by horseshoe falls, water wildly down wildly around the small tranquil area. My feet were planted firmly into the emerald grass, staring out into the mysterious landscape before me. The water seemed to outstretch for miles. I was furious with myself, confused; baffled to even why I would consider reminding her of my existence.. I passed away when she was merely a child, old enough to be her senior. The older guardian she knew me as was only a reflection, no, an illusion of myself… The only difference? I aged. But—

..Why would I leave my weapon behind?

My beloved Masumune.. The very weapon I never released from my grasp.. Perhaps it was because I knew there would be no danger in the Farplane? I was lying to myself and I knew it. I was torturing her, that was all I was doing with my peculiar behavior as of late… That was if I still remained within her memory… But even if I didn't, my gentle reminder left behind wouldn't do much justice.

I rose my currently usable, gloved hand to the bridge of my nose, my forehead creased along with my brows arching furiously… What was I to do about it now? It wasn't like I could return to the world of the living and retrieve what I left behind by magically snapping to erase the mistake I had made…

But what if she never finds it? On the same note, what if she already did? Struck upright in the rubble of what was previously Zanarkand.. The very beadery I tore from her hands as she slept peacefully… It was infuriating. She knew nothing then, not a single thing. I was still human to her, not a condemned being simply hanging on by the pyreflies that weaved through my very structure. What a careless move…

I could feel her approaching along with Yuna and an unfamiliar female… Zanarkand was linked to the Farplane and to Spira, just as Guadosalam was. I really wish it was as easy to exit the Farplane as it was to enter, just as those three did previously to take care of business with a particular fellow… It was there I got a brief glance of Rikku.. My, she really did grow in the few years—she grew into a woman. But it was then had I realized that she had truly forgotten about me. Her face seemed almost expressionless besides for that grin she always plastered across her pretty features… I could always see through that faux mask of hers… She always did put on some sort of masquerade to conceal her true feelings. But she was happy that day. She was determined. I nearly sighed with relief to know I was off her mind.. But that good feeling only lasted for a matter of seconds before the emotion known as sorrow washed over me…

However, I didn't really know anymore…

All I could really do now was sit and watch as the events unfolded… I prayed to Yevon that she of all people would not use the entranceway to the Farplane for merely a pleasure. I must say, I was disappointed in Yuna for that… After all, Tidus never really was among us… He was almost as fabricated as I was. Hopefully she would forget and allow me to wallow in my own pain. I never should have used her to drown away my own misery… In doing so, I caused her much grief and sadness… Something that I never intended to do to begin with…

Forgive me, Rikku…

Forget me entirely. Illuminate me from your memories and replace it with a vague outline. For, I never was supposed to be there after all…


End file.
